Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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