Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize