I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Randomize
