ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
