Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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