I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
