i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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