I must be too annoying 4 u.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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