If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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