WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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