This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
