Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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