So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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