she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
All the doctor said was why
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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