No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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