please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize