i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
