So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So much Jack, so little girl.
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