i just google imaged poop.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
