No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
