It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
