wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
