yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize