Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia