? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
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I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol