I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
