HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm too high and old for this...
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
