drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
