Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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