Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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