i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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