"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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