I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
