After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
