mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
