I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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