he puts the penis in happiness.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
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