Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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