Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
