Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
