a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
