so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
