Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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