I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
