I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
