She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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