On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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