I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
