She went from zero to smokin in five shots
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
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