no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
then he tried to convert me to islam
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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