I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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