is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize